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Expert Advice from wedding guru, Sharon Naylor

Sharon

Sharon Naylor

Sharon Naylor is the author of over 35 wedding planning books and a frequent guest expert on Get Married with Colin Cowie, Good Morning America, and other top shows. Recently featured in such magazines as Martha Stewart Wedding, InStyle Weddings, Brides, Modern Bride and Southern Bride, she is the iVillage Weddings expert and host of "Here Come the Moms" at Wedding Podcast Network.

She lives in Morristown NJ with her husband Joe, and loved using Wedding Mapper for her own April '08 wedding.

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Question_mark Question:

What are the top 5 questions to ask when you’re searching for the perfect reception site?

Answer:

When you picture your dream reception site, no doubt you’re envisioning a beautiful ballroom, or perhaps a flower-filled garden. Maybe you’re thinking about where the band will be set up, or how amazing the cocktail party food is going to be. The beauty of your site is, of course, very important to you, but there are a few essential questions you need to ask at every site you tour so that your site not only looks perfect, but works perfectly for you:

1. Will we be the only wedding here? You can’t assume that you’ll have the run of the place if the site only has one ballroom, since some sites are now doubling their income by placing one wedding inside the building and another wedding outside in the gardens and on the terrace. It’s of the utmost importance that your chosen site only book one wedding at a time so that you get the full attention of the chefs and cooking staff, the serving crew, the manager, and everyone else who works there. You’d be in grave danger of ‘second-class treatment’ if your smaller wedding has been overshadowed by the more expensive, high-society wedding that books the garden area. Some recent wedding couples have complained that the site never alerted them to their status of ‘the other wedding,’ and thus they were assigned the site’s less-experienced servers. And the kitchen was overwrought with work, slow to bring food out, and all of the hot dishes came out to the crowd cold and congealed. Not to mention the issue of wedding crashers. If you’re the upper-budget, society wedding, who knows who could wander into your party from the other event?

2. Is the chef flexible with the menu? Some sites offer a big list of appetizers, entrees, stations, soups and cakes, but Burger King has a better policy of giving these items to you ‘your way.’ Some chefs just serve up the items from Column A and Column B without any variations, in order to stick with an established package price. What you want is a chef who will sit down with you, personalize your catering plan, perhaps switch out some pricier seafood stations and give you twice the number of veggie or cultural foods stations, use more organic foods as per your requests, and meet your budget by using gourmet sauces and garnishes to make less expensive pasta and chicken dishes into masterpieces. Always ask if the chef customizes the menu, for the best results on the Big Day.

3. Are there areas where our guests can relax? It sounds like a no-brainer, but some sites don’t provide enough seating for the cocktail party. Your ideal site will have round tables inside near the cocktail party food, near the bar, and perhaps also outside on a terrace, chairs out on the lawn…all so that your guests can mingle in their own chosen areas, in their own chosen groups for their ultimate comfort. That’s way better than having all of your guests crammed into one smaller ballroom, standing up with their plates and wine glasses in hand, constantly scanning the room for one of the smaller tables to open up.

4. How well-maintained is this place? When the site manager takes you on a guided tour of the ballrooms, the bridal suite and the outdoor areas, ask if you can take a stroll by yourselves. Walk through the gardens to be sure the pathways are well paved, that the landscaping is well-manicured, the pond with the fountain doesn’t have dead koi floating on top. Visit all of the restrooms to assess the design and functionality of all of them. Do you notice ‘out of order’ signs on some stalls? Are carpets stained in the main areas? Look with an eagle eye at how well this site is maintained, because one thing is for sure – your guests will notice.

5. What are the restrictions? Some sites will not allow you to have a tent set up on their lawns, since the stakes wreck the grass. The same goes for aisle runners. Some sites don’t allow them because they may crush the grass, and they also might cause a guest to trip and fall, opening up a potential lawsuit. Speaking of lawsuits, you want to ask to see the site’s insurance and inspection certificates, so that you know they’re covered for anything that might occur during your wedding. Yes, sites and vendors need to have their own insurance, and you’re within your rights to ask to see the most current inspection certificates for the kitchen, too. It’s your wedding. It’s your right. Just ask.


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Visit her website for more information about her books and articles.

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